He's Here!

We have just returned from the hospital. Turns out baby boy wanted March 30th for his birthday, instead. Around 8pm we settled down to watch Survivor and Hunter's phone rang. It was the social worker advising us that R, the birth mother, was on her way to the hospital. We grabbed our bags jumped in the car and drove towards Richmond in a drizzling rain.

But, when we were about 10 minutes from the hospital, his phone rang again. I realized who it was and screamed "is he here?" Hunter said yes. It was around 10pm So we missed seeing him come into this world. But when we got to the labor room R and her mother explained how dramatic and fast it all happened. I think it was better for all that we were not in the mix.

We couldn't see him right away. He was being tended to. Doing whatever it is they do to newborns. R looked tired, but happy. Her mom was so nice. We went to the waiting area until they came to take R to a regular room on the maternity ward.

And on the way there, we stopped at the nursery window. R's mother picked him out instantly. He weighed 8.15 pounds and has a head full of dark hair. We watched as they bathed him. I could hear him screaming through the glass. But he calmed down as soon as they finished the bath. He screamed again after the flash on my camera went off.

It was 1am at that point. We had talked it over with the social worker and she suggested we might want to go home and get some rest and come back this afternoon to spend some time with him. We left R and her mom so they could get some rest. They were still examining him when we left, so we haven't held him yet. Pictures will have to wait. Time for bed.

The Call

Waited anxiously all day to hear something, anything from the agency. I called at 3:30, but both social workers were out of the office so I left a message. Got a call around 4:20 from one of them. She advised that the paperwork they requested had arrived and looked fine. She then asked if there was anything else I needed. Wait, what?? So I mentioned that, you know, I think the birth mother had a DR'S APPOINTMENT TODAY! Oh, right, she says, he was due last week wasn't he. I said yes. Anyway, they had not had a chance to speak to her today and that was that.

Then I went to the grocery store. As I walked I could hear this adorable tune on the muzak playing. I thought, that is familiar. Where do I know that from? Then I realized it was the special ring I had assigned the agency for when we would get THE call. Frantically, I pulled the phone out of my purse and answered.

Turns out the birth mother had left a voice mail for the other social worker reporting that she was dilated 3cm and the doctor decided to schedule her for induction tomorrow morning - 6:30am!

So after contacting all interested parties, I'm at home to make sure all my packing is done. Hunter is on his way home with a bassinet from his parents. I'm making Mom's famous tuna fish casserole because, frankly it's the only thing I know how to cook without thinking or a recipe.

Just so everybody understands, by Virginia state law, the birth parents have a 10 day period during which they may change their minds. If everything goes as planned tomorrow, the baby will come home with us as a foster child. And then, we see what happens.

I haven't slept well the last 2 nights. I think tonight is gonna be even harder, but I'm glad this day is here. I'm so glad they didn't schedule it for April Fool's Day!

Still Waiting...

Sorry for not having any updates. But, there's not much to update. Baby is taking his sweet time. I did buy a car seat and pack-n-play this weekend. I took my parents along with me, while Hunter worked with his parents on laying ceramic tile in the bathrooms. My mom bought so much stuff. She is so excited. We had to go to Home Depot, not once, but twice to pick up more grout etc, for the tile floors. The car was so fully packed for the ride home that my mom said, "The way this car is packed, you'd think we'd bought everything the boy will need until he goes to college!" Not quite, but you get the idea.

Keep Calm and Carry On

No bambino today. News from the agency is that Baby's Birth Mother had a doctor's appointment today and that all went well. He's just not ready to make an appearance. The next appointment is for next Wednesday, if we make it that far. Anyway, we have plenty to do around here and I'm craving some ice cream right now ;)  Stay tuned...

Super Moon!

I walked outside near dusk last night and happened to notice we were close to getting a full moon. I remembered what my mother, an ER nurse, always said. She hated working on nights when there was a full moon because it seemed every pregnant woman went into labor and every crazy person got crazier, and they all ended up in the ER. Knowing that the baby's due date is this Wednesday, I briefly thought about the pregnant woman part. Hmmm.

Then, at 3am this morning, I awoke and couldn't get back to sleep. (I wonder why) I decided to get up and cruise the Internet for awhile. Then I remembered the moon and wanted to know what day it would be at its fullest. So I Googled "March 2011 full moon". And there they were. The stories about the Super Moon happening tomorrow night. The stories of natural disasters happening. Very scary considering the Japan and NZ quakes. And the more plausible stories that the tides will be much higher in the next few days. And then I remembered what my Mom said about full moons and pregnant women. I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

Nesting

I have definitely started nesting. I've been making lists of things I need to do before we bring the baby home. I have been cleaning out closets and taking things to the charity shops. And of course, cleaning - my favorite thing. NOT!

One of the things I would like to do is prepare some meals to freeze. I know you can freeze soups and lasagnas, but my brain can't think of any others. One of our cousins got some chickens recently and she is very generously sharing the eggs with us. Almost too generously. We are overrun with them at the moment. I'm thinking of making some quiches but don't know if they freeze well.

The other thing I would like to do is encourage Hunter to cook more. He can throw a frozen pizza in the oven and make a salad. And like most guys he can grill. Other than that he is lost in the kitchen. When I ask him what we might need to add to our grocery list, he immediately says popcorn and sodas and that's it. I'd like to find some simple fix meals that I can teach him. My mom's tuna fish casserole is an example. It only has three ingredients and you just throw them in a casserole and bake.

Any suggestions??

One Week Countdown

We have had a week to get used to the news of our possible impending adoption. And now we have a week to get ready for Baby's arrival. But that, of course, depends on the baby's schedule of when he would like to make his appearance.

So far the plan is that Baby's Birth Mother will call the agency when she has gone into labor and they will in turn call us. We live about 85 miles from the hospital in Richmond. I have been making a list of must do's. I must keep the car fully fueled. I must keep my cell phone fully charged and with me at all times. We must make sure we have a car seat to bring Beanie Baby home.

Our agency's social worker reports that the Birth Mother is experiencing a lot of pressure, but that the baby hasn't dropped yet. Having never been pregnant, I don't know exactly what that means. Baby's Birth Mother has agreed that I join her in the delivery room. I just can't even imagine it all. We are ready no matter what. What will be, will be.

Sort of Speechless...

This will be short and sweet. We went to the agency this morning and met with the birth mother. Turns out she had already made her decision and that decision is to place her baby boy with us. I can't really describe how it feels. Hunter said it was surreal. But we are so thankful for this current possibility. Having learned from our failed placement, we are cautiously optimistic. The birth parents both have a 10 day period during which they can change their minds after the baby is born. He is due March 23rd. Not much time to prepare, but we will do what we need to do and we'll manage. Thanks so much for all the love and prayers.

Lost and Found

Genealogy has been an on and off hobby of mine forever. Back in the 1970s, my great aunt painstakingly traced my father's paternal tree back to England in the 1840s. In the late 1990s when the Internet finally became a household item, I took to RootsWeb trying to find out how the Isle of Wight Biddlecombs came across the Atlantic. A nice lady was able to give me some info about the previous generation before the family emigrated. I shared it with family members and we were all amazed at the info.

Then I met Hunter and I more or less forgot about genealogy, what with trying to reproduce and  continue the family line and all. So after Monday's shocking call from the adoption agency, I received another shocking call on Tuesday. Or rather, my Mom and Dad did. The two of them called me at work and said they had just gotten off the phone with a lady from the Isle of Wight in England and she was looking for me! What???

She and Dad talked a little while. He grabbed his aunt's notes and it turns out that she is one of our long lost cousins still living on the Isle of Wight. She was looking for me because of a couple of inquiries I had made on RootsWeb all those years ago. Amazing! So my cousin and I have been emailing back and forth this past week. Today I am sitting here having a cup of tea and getting ready to scan my aunt's work from all those years ago to send to my new found cousin. I was just looking through the pages and, there it is, the link between us two. My aunt knew the name of our mutual ancestor and the last name of her husband but not much else. So now, hopefully we will know more about this side of the family.

It's all too much to take in. But it is a welcome distraction as we prepare to go to Richmond tomorrow. So, dear cousin, if you are reading this, I am getting to work. It's going to be a rainy day here so not much else to do. So glad to have been found.

Come Monday, it'll be alright

I've been thinking the last few days about how things seem to happen so randomly in our adoption journey. And about how emotions can be affected by the slightest things. It all seems to happen for no reason. But then, I get some distance from an event and suddenly I see that maybe these things aren't all that random.

Two weekends ago, I was having a lovely Saturday. I was debating whether to finally put the boxes of Christmas decorations away and dismantle the tree. Although I had taken the ornaments off the tree soon after Twelth Night, I had waited a few days before taking down the tree. Then we got the call from the birth mother and after that I really didn't care about the tree or the boxes of decorations cluttering up the living room. As I stood there, I had the thought of "What the heck". Why don't I just decorate it with Mardi Gras beads and leave it up until Fat Tuesday?

With this in mind, I went to the front hall closet to look for the beads. Bad idea. That's where I had stored the few baby things that I and others had bought for the baby we would never bring home. One thing was the diaper bag I bought last summer and filled with diapers and other things we would need should we ever get a last minute call to meet a birth mother in the hospital. I had been keeping it in our bathroom closet intending to keep filling it with the items we would eventually need. But on January 13th I snatched it and all the other baby items in the house, including a Tigger costume I bought on impulse for the baby to wear for Halloween this year, and with tears in my eyes I shoved them all into the hall closet.

I had forgotten they were there. So there I was staring at them all again. I blinked a few times and then decided. I could either break down and cry or I could face it head on. I chose the latter. I snatched the diaper bag out of the closet along with a baby book someone had given us. It is a baby book that you can record baby's milestones and it also includes some Bible stories and songs. I held the bag and the book tightly and I prayed.

I prayed to God that the birth mother and her baby in Alabama were doing well. I prayed that someone would look out for them and keep them safe. I thanked God for putting forgiveness in my heart. For I truly wish them both the best. Then I asked him for patience. I knew then that I must resolve to wait and trust God and I told him that was what I would do. Then I put the diaper bag along with the baby book back in the bathroom closet where I now see it every day. Ever since then, I could feel my heart starting to heal.

I still have bad days. I was feeling pretty low last weekend. I never did find the Mardi Gras beads, so we just went ahead and put the Christmas stuff back in the attic. Hunter wanted to work on completing the last of the flooring in our basement. But, I thought, what's the point? The weight of the knowledge of how much further we were going to have to climb towards an adoption was heavy on my mind. What was the point of it all? I went back to work on Monday dreading the day knowing that we had to finally talk to the Texas adoption agency about our failed placement. As I said in the last post, that turned out just fine and the day got a little better.

Of course, little did I know what was in store for me that afternoon. When I saw that our Virginia agency was calling, I wish I could say what the social worker said to me was a suprise. But I knew what she would say before we even started talking. It was such a strange feeling, yet it felt perfectly natural. Almost like I was expecting it. I wonder where that feeling came from? But I think I know the answer to that question.

I have no idea what to expect on Monday when we go to meet this birth mother in Richmond. The waiting is making me crazy. But I know it is what is required of me. "Good things come to those who wait" That is your positive thought for today. Pay it forward!