Monday, November 1, 2010

National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month. Last year when I found out about National Adoption Month, it was when Nia Vardalos was spotlighted for adopting a young child and I was inspired by her story. Now, a year later, we are at the of beginning our own journey to adoption.

Last week was unlike anything I have ever imagined. There have been all kinds of well wishes on our making an adoption match. But there have been unexpected reactions too. Some folks are content just to say "Good Luck". But then there are others who get very carried away with asking questions. They want to know our birth mother's story and why she agreed to place her child for adoption. Or what about the birth father? Could he come and take the baby? Those are the tough questions. On the one hand, if it is a good friend asking, I'm torn. I know I can trust them, but should I?

Baby's birth mother has a right to privacy. Her story is not mine to tell. But her story will always be a part of Baby's story. You can see the dilemma. Thankfully, I understood the reasons behind the questions. In this case the questions came from those who have witnessed Hunter and I go through a lot of disappointments over the years. They just wanted to be sure we were making the best decision for our adoption.

And probably the biggest revelation this past week is in realizing so many people don't know much about adoption at all. I got really basic questions like how would we get Baby? Would the lawyer bring the baby to us? I didn't mind these questions. In fact, those questions tell me that I need to do as much as I can to educate the folks around me about adoption. I realized they don't know, because they don't need to know. They aren't asking questions just to be nosey.

I have lived and breathed and researched adoption for the last 4 years. I can't expect the people who care about me to know what I know. But I am glad that they care. And I guess that's the point of National Adoption Month. So those of you out there who see me in the street, feel free to ask me anything. Just be warned that I can't or won't share every little detail about this match. All anyone really needs to know is that Baby and Baby's mother(s) are doing just fine.

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