Happy Father's Day to
Hunter
Poppa
and Grandpa
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Did I Mention I Love "Modern Family"?
I can't get "Modern Family" out of my head. The last episode this year really touched me. At the beginning of the season, Mitch and Cam, fathers of Lily, decided they wanted to add to their family. They announced they were planning to adopt a baby boy. There were a few other adoption issues on TV shows this season. One of them was on "Glee". I like "Glee". But the birth mother issue in those episodes could have been represented better. A lot of people criticized the way they portrayed Quinn's anger and wanting to have her baby returned. But, you know, I bet there are birth mothers out there who can identify with those feelings. So, that's all I have to say about that.
But the thing I can't get out of my head, is the scene where Mitch and Cam wander out into a field after learning that they would not be bringing home a baby. I could write a million blog posts and never make anyone understand what that feeling is like. But, the two of them, laying in that field, holding hands, comforting each other... I've been there and I know what that's like. I've said it before. Adoption is not easy and that's probably what makes it so rewarding. I'm so glad the writers didn't take the easy way out of this story line.
But the thing I can't get out of my head, is the scene where Mitch and Cam wander out into a field after learning that they would not be bringing home a baby. I could write a million blog posts and never make anyone understand what that feeling is like. But, the two of them, laying in that field, holding hands, comforting each other... I've been there and I know what that's like. I've said it before. Adoption is not easy and that's probably what makes it so rewarding. I'm so glad the writers didn't take the easy way out of this story line.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
Adoption Day
We started filing our adoption papers in October 2011. Long story short, we received the final order of adoption on Wednesday, May 2nd. We celebrated by going to Aunt Ouizer's Kentucky Derby Party. It was a Hat Party. So much fun!
Today, we go on Richard's first boat ride for the annual Blessing of the Fleet.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Adoption update
Even though Richard has been with us since birth, we could only start the legal part of adopting him last October. We did our part filling out the necessary paperwork from our agency and attorney. So we have just been waiting for all the red tape to be passed back and forth between the court, our agency/attorney and the state. We got an email from our social worker a couple of weeks ago saying that she just knew the final order of adoption would come through before his first birthday. Then around Richard's birthday the SW said she was going to check and see what was taking so long. Turns out the judge asked for something to be changed in the paperwork. Our attorney had already taken care of it and we are still waiting.
What this means is that Richard is still a ward of Children's Home Society and we are still his guardians/prospective adoptive parents. Once the final order of adoption is signed by the judge, we then have to apply for a new birth certificate and social security number for him. So it looks like we will be filing an extension on our tax return this year. But this is just a blip on the radar screen of our adoption journey. So, we are not too worried about it.
In the mean time, I saw this article about Mariska Hargitay who has adopted two children. In the article she says something Hunter and I heard several times during our adoption jouney, "Adoption is not for the faint of heart". Her description of her adoption journey really struck a chord in me. She and her husband went through a failed placement. While she acknowledges how painful the experience was, she also points out that it was the best thing for the birth parent and her child.
I think this attitude is the most important thing prospective adoptive parents have to realize. It is not about you. It is about finding the right home for the child. I know I was guilty of the "why me?" syndrome when we had infertility issues. It continued when we decided to adopt and when the waiting period dragged on and on. Then one day, it all clicked for me. The most important person in the adoption triad (birth parent, child, adoptive parent) is the child. This realization helped me redirect my frustrations about adopting into making sure I was living my life to the fullest and not just waiting for a child to come into our lives.
I'm so glad Mariska has shared her adoption experiences. She didn't have to. It's nobody's business. But, thankfully, like Nia Vardalos, she has chosen to use her celebrity to highlight just how fantastic adoption can be.
What this means is that Richard is still a ward of Children's Home Society and we are still his guardians/prospective adoptive parents. Once the final order of adoption is signed by the judge, we then have to apply for a new birth certificate and social security number for him. So it looks like we will be filing an extension on our tax return this year. But this is just a blip on the radar screen of our adoption journey. So, we are not too worried about it.
In the mean time, I saw this article about Mariska Hargitay who has adopted two children. In the article she says something Hunter and I heard several times during our adoption jouney, "Adoption is not for the faint of heart". Her description of her adoption journey really struck a chord in me. She and her husband went through a failed placement. While she acknowledges how painful the experience was, she also points out that it was the best thing for the birth parent and her child.
I think this attitude is the most important thing prospective adoptive parents have to realize. It is not about you. It is about finding the right home for the child. I know I was guilty of the "why me?" syndrome when we had infertility issues. It continued when we decided to adopt and when the waiting period dragged on and on. Then one day, it all clicked for me. The most important person in the adoption triad (birth parent, child, adoptive parent) is the child. This realization helped me redirect my frustrations about adopting into making sure I was living my life to the fullest and not just waiting for a child to come into our lives.
I'm so glad Mariska has shared her adoption experiences. She didn't have to. It's nobody's business. But, thankfully, like Nia Vardalos, she has chosen to use her celebrity to highlight just how fantastic adoption can be.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
One Year
One year ago today, we brought Richard home.
He is our love. He is our companion. We love you Richard!
Friday, March 30, 2012
Sunday, March 25, 2012
The Birthday Week Kickoff!
Richard held court at the Southern Ladies Social Club's monthly lunch. He was the guest of honor for his upcoming birthday.
Auntie J gave him a Bullseye Rocking Horse.
It's a big hit! Good thing his birthday is coming up because I think he needs a few more toys ;)
He is practicing for Auntie Ouizer's Kentucky Derby Party
Richard's cousin M is going to make him an Otter cake for the big day
The otters were his favorite part of visiting the NC Aquarium back in October.
This year has gone so fast. I know it's a cliche, but it's true. Happy Birthday week, my little buddy!
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